April Foolishess: Seed Cake by Dan Essman



Living in Willits, California, is one of my favorite poets, Dan Essman, who is a (very) funny person in his spare time.  Here's a bit of April Foolishness from Dan.   

You can find more of his work on Scribd




SEED CAKE:  A Droll Dialogue
by Dan Essman

Miss Mouse, Miss Mouse.
Yes Mr. Bear.

Miss Mouse, would you invite me for tea on Thursday?
I would love to, I would love to have you for tea on Thursday

Oh Miss Mouse, Miss Mouse, would you, if it were not too much trouble, make me one of your wonderful seed cakes? I do so love seed cake. I mean on Thursday, when I come to your house for tea...if it's not too much trouble?
Why certainly, Mr. Bear, I will make seed cake for you when you come to my house on Thursday.

Oh Miss Mouse, my dear Miss Mouse, I do love seed cake...Mr. Squirrel once bragged that his acorn biscuits were the very best confection to serve with tea and while I agree that a good acorn biscuit should not be scorned, still, squirrels are notoriously unreliable and besides...I do so love your wonderful seed cake...

Mr. Bear, you seem so forlorn, it is as if you somehow doubted that you will have your seed cake on Thursday.
My dear Miss Mouse...it is just that Thursday is so very far away and so much can happen in this world between now and then, I mean, between this moment and Thursday...do you happen by chance to possess some seed cake that I might have today?

I don't believe so...
Perhaps shoved way back on the bread shelf?

No...
Or under your bright kitchen apron?

No...
It's just that seed cake can be so easily be mislaid.

I'm so very sorry, Mr. Bear, but you ate all the seed cake last Thursday.
How ashamed I am, what a greedy Bear I am. 
Because I was so shamefully greedy, Miss Mouse, does that mean you won't invite me next Thursday to your house for tea and seed cake?

Why what a silly Mr. Bear you are. Don't you know that I love you truly and that you can come to my house for seed cake every day of the week except the Sabbath...
And what happens on the Sabbath my dear Miss Mouse?

Why on the Sabbath, Mr. Bear, we are to marry.
To marry! Oh my, how extraordinarily wonderful! 
Will we have seed cake at the wedding?

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